Dial Up Connections: Okay, first of all your child may not ever experience a land line much less the insane symphony that is the dial-up connection noise. Unless your child is grounded from the phone, or grandma only knows the house number, your child’s web surfing and phone conversation will never be the mutually exclusive experiences of the 90s!
Video Rentals: Going to Blockbuster used to be an event. You’d grab a couple movies, get bummed out when ALL the copies of the newest release were checked out, and load up on candy and microwavable popcorn. Needless to say, these stores aren’t making a comeback any time soon.
Be Kind, Rewind: Your kids will never have to press stop and rewind umpteen times in hopes to get back to the beginning of the movie – and then fast forward through the commercials. Same goes for cassettes!
24 Hour Photo Processing: With smart phones only getting smarter and image sharing websites like Instagram and Facebook; hardly any of the photos we take get developed anymore. We now have the means to cheaply and quickly print photos at home or at a local pharmacy with a 1 hour turnaround. Additionally, unlike disposable cameras of the 80s and 90s; when your kids print their photos 1/2 of the film isn’t too ‘damaged’ to proccess.
Encyclopedia: Remember before smartphones and tablets when we had to actually discuss things? Your child will never have to fetch the encyclopedia to prove their brothers and sisters wrong; they can just ask Siri!
Passing Notes: With cell phones, theres no more need for a “Do you like me? Yes – No – Maybe” note; and no need for a shoebox full of note passing memories of a misspent youth. Instead, they can Snap Chat duck face selfies and exchange emojis to figure out the nuances of young love.
Phone Books: Back in the day if you wanted to call a business you had to hope they had a listing in the phone book. Today we can find a whole plethora of different businesses using a ‘Near Me’ function on your phones map app. If you do get a phone book, you will either use it as a booster seat or let it get terribly soggy on the front porch for a week while debating what you’re supposed to do with it. By time your kids are adults its questionable if they will even be printed anymore.
Pay Phones: Pay phones are few and far between these days – and so is loose change for that matter! With cellphones, quick charging cables and even extended battery cases; your kids will never need to hunt down a payphone to call home!
Mystery Phone Calls: Getting an ‘unlisted’ phone call on your cell is almost always telemarketing. Odds are your kids will know better than to answer. Your child will never have the rush of wondering who could be calling. 9 times out of 10 the number will be programmed in their phone.
Getting Lost: How many adults do you know that still keep road maps in their car? You can probably count them on one hand- and I would also venture a guess they are over 65. Your children are unlikely to ever get lost with the amount of electronic resources at their disposal – but maybe sneak a state map in their car just in case.
